pärlipüüdja

It's 4 in the morning and I'm still up! Those of you who have not had to get up at six for nine months, do not get to question what is so special about that :D

I have not giggled as much as I did today for a long time. It was a fantastic random night out with three fantastic young ladies, who all happen to be (or have been) teachers! A fact, which got two of them in a bit of a peculiar situation...

Having agreed upon meeting the team of Noored Kooli for a party next Thursday, one of us decided the day is too far and we should start sooner. So once back from the conclusions and ending event of the first year we hit the new (to us) club 360. It didn't take long until the peculiar occurred - the bouncer suddenly asked N if she worked in this-or-that school and it turned out he was a senior in the same school!!! How random is that? I have met mine in clubs too, but not as workers...

The music was odd, and I forgot to ask for Pärlipüüdja, tho I don't really understand how can you have a party with hits from the 70s, 80s and 90s and not play Pärlipüüdja. Not being estonian would be the only excuse which the DJ didn't seem to have. But we still got plenty of music out of him to dance to and go absolutely wild :D

It is amusing following the patterns you see in all of the clubs, tho all in all it is usually just too depressing. However, we did find a guy who just danced with a few different girls during the night, but didn't feel the need to try and possess any of them. A nice change considering the rest of them. And to be honest, no wonder we, Estonian girls, have the reputation that we do... Sad!

Anyways, the guys, the music, the drinks (tho non-alcoholic for me) or something else made the environment perfect for an enormous amount of giggling and face-making etc! It was a great ending to a great ending day. The after party of the after party :P

But now, I will bid you good night, wish you good morning or a pleasant day!

Say what you need to say

Life is too short not to live it. It is too beautiful not to enjoy. It is too precious to waste.

Spent Monday morning in a swamp near my summer house. The sun rising through to mist rising from the little lakes. The cobwebs glittering with the dew. The silence and peacefulness of the wild. It all made up beautifully for not being able to spend midsummer's with friends and family.

The WHO European Ministerial Conference has been fascinating. I did a bit of networking today! I'm so proud of myself :) Wish I could get everything done that has been waiting in line, but this job has taken up a lot of time. It has, however, been fulfilling in ways I couldn't imagine when I started it. There's such a different perspective on life that one does not see in Estonia too often. I need to get away and make it a part of me before I can come back and be really happy here.
Not that there aren't fantastic people here and that I was unhappy, but I know there is something else that I need to feel and process and let myself change. Can't wait for the 6th of July!

A part of me is hoping that whatever it is I am looking for is not somewhere else, but somewhere right here, under my nose. But I suppose it takes a different view point to be able to see it, if it really is here. Though, then again, perhaps it's not here and if I don't go now, I might never find out. This past year changed me in many ways and not all towards the worse. Maybe this is the determination I was looking for all along. Perhaps the reasons are not all that important, but it's about getting a move on and seeing whether the place I end up at will get to greet a happier me. Or say good bye to one some day.

Anyways, loads of work to be done and need some rest too before another hectic, but hopefully fascinating day!

...like a love heart carved on a tree...

The sixth toe has given up on me. Guess I'm not Latvian enough. I'm not complaining. Still looks a bit rainbow-like, but until it doesn't hurt it should be fine. A but bruised otherwise though. Again. It really shouldn't come as a surprise anymore but for some reason it still does. Oh well. You can't blame a girl for hoping. Tad annoying still. Freakin' Houdini wannabes...

It's still a great summer! There was a fantastic thunder storm yesterday. I was too lazy to go to the sea, tho it only lasted for a little while so it would probably have been over by the time I had made my way to the beach. It was still glorious! Just about as fabulous as I looked on my night out :P

The Lady of the Camelias is nice. Old and romantic. The way I like 'em...

sauna incident

Mmmmmmidnight coffee-cake snack :P It is sooooo yummie and no, I am not too concerned about this not being the first blog beginning with food! We already ate all the coffee-chocolate coffee beans from on top of the cake with Gerd. So not good for me, but I figured I deserve something good after realising I am turning Latvian and growing a sixth toe! The other possibility is that I was bitten by some extra furious ant while I was lying on my back outside in the rain with the raindrops disappearing from my skin as soon as they touch it as it was that hot from the sauna. But I'm going with the first option and will maybe have to move to Latvia in autumn instead of all the other options...

Well, where ever I end up, at least I'll be the only six-toed Estonian! Unless it decides to stop growing overnight. And as it is rather late and the internet connection here isn't one of the friendliest I've met it might be a good idea to say good night and start working on my fantastic looking hairdo for the morning after going to bed with undried hair!

Witch's Promise

And I'm going to Lisbon aswell! How good is this day!!!! As if things weren't perfect already, it now started raining :) I'm not sure the Belgian monarchs are too happy about that, but then again, it's late enough for them to be nicely tucked in dreaming about beautiful Estonia and all those fascinating things they've seen so far. I wonder if anyone took them to Kopli...

Fascination

This is what I get for trying to have a social life - loads and loads of undone homework that I have about no time to finish before the exams! I could of course be doing them now, but I am just exhausted and all together think that it should be obvious how smart I am and no hw should be required at all!!! Anyways, still have to do them and will start soon. Just afterI have mentioned what a fantastic day I've had!

It started off earlier than planned, after 4 hrs of sleep, which gave me a chance to get some hw done. Then, was only 10 min late to a meeting with our new PR kinda person, who turned out to be pretty fantastic and we chatted for an hour about apyn and HIV and it was really fascinating. Then, got something done in Viimsi, which was mostly chatting with T and then looting a colleague's classroom for materials to use tmrw. Then had a delicious lunch at the same colleague's with sushi, pasta and rhubarb pie! (yummmmmmy) And theeeennnn, drove to our very own office flea market which resulted in coming back with about the same amount of things I took there, but all new and funky! Before I left, found out that I'm going to Brussels again to talk moooore about HIV/aids and and and... Even the drive back home was all smiley and happy :)

I like being happy even tho there are soooo many things to do and so little energy and motivation. Should try this happiness thing more often...

That's the Way

Up at three in the morning... Loving those nights and getting back into the routine that actually works - late to bed, not so early to rise! How else would I know for sure that it really doesn't get dark at all around midsummer's? And aren't those nights just glorious! There was a proper shower on the way to E's, but it has cleared up nicely by now and I do somewhat miss someone to take me out on midnight walks.

I am loving my new dress (or both of them really) and met someone today who has more shoes than me! And I can proudly say that I am taking two dresses, some shoes and some other stuff to the ENL Kirbukas tmrw to find new owners for them. I went through my jewelry but only to find some old favourites and realise I am not ready to give them up just yet. I admit to having too many things. I should go backpacking to see how little I can actually manage with. Tho I'm not sure I'd last more than a week on only a backpack full of stuff. Being too comfortable and safe can be hindering. Would be great to know if my Brussels-Lisbon-Vienna plan will work out. That would mean a few weeks on a single suitcase. I suppose that is a challenge enough for me now!

I remember now why I haven't been very good at this blogging thing - I miss real conversations with real people too much! Even a comment here and there makes me happier than blogging for just myself. The thought of writing to no one at all is a bit sad. Internet is great, FB is great, Orkut is great, MSN is great, but real people and real conversations spiced with real emotions and real expressions and real humour are so much greater!

Right, time for bed, busy day tmrw. Don't even want to think about the approaching exams! I hate having to miss a family outing because of those. At least I should be all finished with them by the WHO conference, which is certainly a good thing.

Thick as a Brick

Buckwheat with mozzarella, tomatoes and thyme - yumyumyummmm. It would've been basil instead of thyme, both of which my flatmate is growing on the balcony, but I only have permission to occasionally plunder the second. This is one of the reasons I wouldn't mind living in the countryside - being able to grow my own food (not that I would actually manage that, but it's the thought that counts, right?).

So, back from another fantastic weekend, this time in Southern Estonia. I feel so detached from all work (except painting the house and babysitting, which are so far from the usual meaning of the word in my case). I spent hours on FB today, answering stupid questions and feeling even dumber for doing it. It just seems so difficult to start with all the things that need doing. Should probably start with the clothes in the washing machine that need hanging, but am too lazy for that!

I finished another book - Mark Haddon's The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. It was surprising and somehow recognisable at the same time. I wonder if all kids are somewhat autistic at some point, or was it just me? Perhaps I am just finding excuses for my insufficient social skills...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OuAtVm--mTg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orACIBjHuI4
I'm so glad there are more and more British artists gaining popularity in Est, singing with beautiful accents. Wish I could hear that one charming mixture of so many different influences again. Funny, the things one manages to miss.

Bobs, action plans and bikes

Uuuhhh, I hope there are no hidden cameras in the office yet. I just danced a bit :) I really need to find a place to dance properly - even those 3 minutes showed how out of shape I am. Well, at least heading out to do some clubbing in a little while. There are some Brazilians playing at Clazz tonight. And the single release party of Külalised. Music is odd. There is such magic to it that even if you for some reason do not believe in fairies and elves then you still must admit that there is some inexplicable mystery in the world and if not hidden anywhere else, then in music undoubtedly. Tho I must say I haven't quite taken to the magic of his Bobness Mr Dylan. not that I'm not truly grateful to my dear sis and her fantastic fella for organising everything for me and to T for looking out for me in the crowds. I guess there are times to discover certain artists and this was not the time for me and Bob. Who knows, maybe one day... The guys got me reallllly exited tho speaking about Zep's possible concert which turned out to be Def Leopard instead. Disappointing, but what can you do.


I realised today that I have met Dorian Gray! It remains to be seen if this is a good thing or rather not, but at least now I know.

Bicycle - not that great of a means of transportation. It is odd how something you have wholeheartedly believed to be a good thing causes you so much concern! Not considering the times I have been late to meetings because something or other has needed my attention on the bike, but falling over more than once is really not acceptable! Today's wasn't as bad as the first, but it wasn't much fun either. I wish I could figure out whether I am staying in Tallinn next year or not, so I'd know whether to buy a proper fancy-prancy vehicle. And what's with these new places presenting themselves so appealing now??? It's all fascinating and such, but a little determination would be nice! Just wish I knew where that determination lies. This is what I'll do with my old bike: (The pic taken in Belgium btw... oh, the randomness of life!)


One goal for life finally set. Whohooo... Too bad it's not something you could write an action plan for. Tho I guess some people do. Then again, some people are really strange. But, as said somewhere in facebook I suppose - I am stranger than most, so I should know all about the action plans of such matters...

Ooooh, spent loads of money on books yesterday! Have my very own BaT now! Haven't started with it yet, resorted to the one I promised to return at some point (wouldn't mind that point being rather sooner than later...) Anyways, it made me happy! Tho should not collect too many before moving somewhere as A so correctly warned me...

home

A bit of photo evidence to go with the last post. So you wouldn't be tempted to think it is all in my head. Which of course it still could be. And there's no way you could tell! I could've just downloaded the pic from the web. The only way you would know if you have been there yourself. And in case you haven't, what exactly are you waiting for? Should you get there when I am not there myself, be sure to greet my granny! She is rather friendly and cooks the best rhubarb pie and the best rhubarb juice thingy.

Kuru

Right, so, write in English... reading in English is a lot easier. "The language of Shakespeare and Dickens". Not intimidating at all! I actually thought of writing an English entry when sitting on the balcony of my summer house, listening to the waves crashing on the beach in the distance. Every now and then I had to lift my eyes from the book in my hands and follow the path of the wind coming through the maples and bird cherries bringing with it the soft snow fall of white petals through the slightly fragranced air. Even if I continued reading, I could at once tell when the wind got to the pine trees as the sound shifted from a more intense sough to a rustling of a different nature.

Out of all the places in the world, this must be the closest to heaven. It's not so much the comfort of the place (I still wish I would come across someone to come a build a sauna next to the house!), but rather the ever presence of it. It has been there for as long as I can remember and except for a few teenage years, it has been my haven for all summers. Whether coming from the most beautiful trip or from any sorrow, there is that one place that never lets me leave without adding to my joy or erasing all sadness. Too bad I couldn't get away throughout the last year... One day I will winter proof the house! But until I have, I will spend as much of my summers there, reading a book in a hammock between the pine trees by day and counting the stars or writing down my own little stories next to the fire place by night. And always take someone with me to the beach to remind me to move about so as to not get horribly sun burnt so that three days later my back would still be sore!!! Volunteers are welcome :)

As said, much better at reading than writing, but here you go, dear English-speaking friends, finally something for you to comment on.

Recent book recommendations: Zadie Smith's On Beauty, Richard Brautigan's In Watermelon Sugar, Yann Martel's Life of Pi (Thanks to the owners!)